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Here are collected notes, observations, and other materials not included in Project Metamorphosis. The chronology is non-linear and at times mixed.

The indeterminate nature of being is perceived by the mind as emptiness. The hardest thing is not 'to understand' or 'to see'; the hardest thing is simply to be the emptiness — pure meaninglessness.

The mind that has not been fully investigated cannot be empty. Abiding in indeterminacy is unbearable. The mind avoids indeterminacy by filling the emptiness with activity: defining itself as someone or something, playing roles, generating judgments, meanings, and concepts.

Such reactive, emptiness-filling activity is a consequence of the unconscious (unlived) content of consciousness. The practice of self-inquiry is aimed at revealing this content and illuminating it with the light of consciousness. The hidden content is lived through, activity ceases. Indeterminacy remains.

At a certain stage, the practitioner recognizes himself as a kind of laminar flow (process), passing through him and simultaneously being him. This flow is consciousness.

Having studied the properties of the flow and the "place" from which it originates, the practitioner discovers a change in the mode of perception. This other perception can be called "parallel," or "immediate."

Direct perception occurs as the simultaneous perception of two "layers." The first "layer" (mundane or sensory) is the awareness of the seen/heard and other felt phenomena; the second layer is the perception of indeterminacy (reality).

These two "layers" are perceived simultaneously, without interfering with each other – the "layers" are nested within each other (integrated).

The perception of reality is accompanied by the suspension of the practitioner's memory and mind. Reality is indeterminacy, and there is nothing for the mind to notice, nor for memory to retain – in that "area," mind and memory cannot perform their functions.

Direct perception induces changes in the practitioner's nature. The changes occur as a loss of definiteness: the observer (as a reference point) disappears, thinking undergoes a "shift," losing its coordinate system. These changes are stable and require no maintenance – this is not an acquisition (of qualities), but a loss.

The disappearance of the observer occurs gradually, beginning with the crossing of the "black lake" (Active Phase of practice). This does not happen as an event but is distributed throughout daily practice. The disappearance of the observer occurs as the disappearance of the distance between observer and observed.

A change occurs in the properties of thoughts: they significantly lose intensity – their "weight" and "volume" – becoming incorporeal. Thoughts do not disappear entirely but degenerate into contentless, insignificant, and blurred condensations in consciousness, arising from time to time from bodily processes (breathing, heartbeat, etc.).

Due to the integration of the "layers," the practitioner understands the very fact of looking into reality. However, this understanding does not allow one to peer there and remember the "content" of reality.

In the early stages of such "dual" direct perception, the practitioner experiences lapses in memory. Most often, the practitioner simply does not remember what happened a minute or an hour ago, does not make plans, for he simply forgets them. The clarity and depth of perception itself, meanwhile, do not change, but peculiarities in memory function are observed.

Gradually, the practitioner adapts; the overlapping of the "layers" ceases – their mutual integration (fusion) occurs. This leads to the simultaneous perception of both "layers." Such immediate simultaneous perception is constant (not fragmentary), requires no effort, and becomes everyday for the practitioner.

The first, mundane "layer" occupies a secondary place and is perceived as translucent: distinctly but detachedly, like an incorporeal echo of what has already happened. This "layer" is "interpretation." Interpretation occurs within the boundaries of the practitioner's body. The body divides perception into two recognizable "layers."

The second "layer" is devoid of any properties. The echo-interpretation emanates from this second "layer" – from reality. The perception of reality cannot be categorized – causality is absent; it is not "practical experience" in the usual sense; it is unconditional indeterminacy.

Such dual perception is always "fresh," unburdened by the "past" and not directed toward the "future"; duration and accumulation are absent. The arising and ceasing of incorporeal phenomena occur within the field of perception.

The division of the "layers" of perception is conditional and has no relation to ontology. The properties of the "layers" are investigated through direct experience, and the conditional division into "primary"/"secondary" arises as an unavoidable adaptation when structuring experience and writing notes.

Nevertheless, even with direct perception, one cannot definitively state that these two "layers" are one thing. At the same time, one cannot say they are separate – no "layer" exists as something independent (material). Any attempt to positively define the nature of the "layers" will be false.

The first "layer" of perception is definitely nothing; the second "layer" is indefinitely nothing. Here lies the boundary of language's capabilities. Beyond this, there are no words, but there is the act of perception. Perception has the body as its limitation. However, the body is not an obstacle but a necessity – without it, one cannot recognize and perceive both "layers" simultaneously.

The entire practice of self-inquiry is the recognition of indeterminacy, its perception, habituation, and natural abiding in it. Beyond this lies only extrapolation (hypothesis).

Direct perception of reality occurs in the direction that the practitioner previously found while executing points 1-2 and maintained through point 3 (from the Practical Method).

In direct perception, distance is absent – the observer and the observed merge. The direction that the practitioner previously maintained through point 3 is also absent. The practice once again changes and now occurs as abiding in indeterminacy – in the "place" where nothing becomes everything.

A distinctive feature of the practice is a sensation mentioned in the Report: "an unusual, soft sensation arises in the body-consciousness, which is difficult to describe due to its simplicity and depth."

This sensation resembles a refined, soft, deep, and disinterested pleasure, not causing habituation. It is a simple sensation, yet contains a great deal. It is difficult to find a suitable definition for it, so this sensation is conditionally called "disinterested pleasure."

The sensation of "disinterested pleasure" arises when consciousness notices itself. This occurs when the practitioner begins to see the light in consciousness. The appearance of the light in the field of perception and the appearance of the sensation of "disinterested pleasure" are directly connected. This sensation fills the practitioner's entire body, sometimes completely, sometimes partially overlapping other bodily sensations.

Simultaneously with the sensation of "disinterested pleasure," a sweet-sour taste arises in the mouth. This taste is concentrated on the palate and intensifies slightly when the tongue is pressed against the palate. At the same time, a slight coolness is felt and saliva with this sweet-sour taste is secreted. Simultaneously, something like an outward-moving movement or outward pressure occurs in the forehead and on the crown of the head.

As practice progresses, the consciousness becomes devoid of artifacts; the light of consciousness ceases to stand out in contrast against their background and becomes an everyday, constantly present phenomenon. The same happens with the sensation of "disinterested pleasure" and the sweet-sour taste in the mouth: they become part of the practitioner's daily life. All of these phenomena are natural consequences; they neither hinder nor help the practice of self-inquiry, but they are present in the field of perception.

Based on observations, this can be approximately interpreted as follows: the light is the "visual aspect" of consciousness, "disinterested pleasure" is the self-sensation of consciousness, and the sweet-sour taste is the taste of consciousness.

In the early stages of practice, after crossing the "black lake," the practitioner loses sexual attraction – it irreversibly fades (extinguishes). The attraction does not disappear instantly, but over about a month to six weeks.

At subsequent stages of practice, the practitioner sometimes experiences nocturnal emissions caused by dreams.

Gradually, the practitioner's dreams become increasingly dim. He discovers that during sleep, a memory of the practice (the rules) surfaces, and the practitioner begins to practice periodically while dreaming. He does not realize that he is asleep but simply performs point 3 of the Practical Method. Gradually, the clear boundary between sleep and waking erodes – it all becomes the first sensory "layer" of perception. Practice in dreams does not always occur: during periods of fatigue, illness, or recovery, the practitioner does not dream.

At this stage, the practitioner directly sees the flow that passes through him and is him. Now this flow is colorless or simply white (initially it had a bluish tint; later the tint disappears). The flow has the property of splitting (branching) into different parts of the practitioner's body. The branches of the main flow cause various activities inherent to different parts of the body.

The splitting of the flow occurs due to obstacles (artifacts): obstacles divide the flow, directing its individual streams to different parts of the body. The elimination of artifacts also eliminates the splitting of the flow. Now the flow passes from bottom to top in a single "channel." The single "channel" is located vertically, approximately from the practitioner's tailbone to the crown of the head.

It sometimes happens that for one reason or another, a branch from the main "channel" occurs. This becomes immediately noticeable; the practitioner observes the branch, and it spontaneously withdraws back into the main "channel" over several minutes, following the tendency to be single (not to split).

Later, dreams change their properties and are perceived as if through white frosted glass.

The elimination of the splitting of the flow deactivates the various activities in the body, depriving them of "fuel." Those dreams that previously caused spontaneous emissions now have no effect and cease to occur. The process of sleep has now become like abiding in a space filled with diffuse white light. Through the light, faintly felt movements – once dreams – are sometimes visible. The intensity of perception during sleep is significantly reduced.

The practitioner has studied the properties of the flow, which is himself. The flow has a tendency to be in a single "channel" – this tendency makes the flow laminar. Any turbulence or artifact (obstacle) in the main flow is immediately noticeable and subject to reverse transformation (return) into the flow.

Due to the flow's tendency to be single, the practitioner does not seek interaction with the surrounding world. He does not avoid interaction but reduces it to a maximum. Interaction with the human part of the surrounding world is like traversing rough terrain. It inevitably deprives the consciousness of laminarity, requiring energy and time for restoration. The practitioner performs only those minimal actions that are necessary. This is dictated not by the practitioner's preferences but by the properties of consciousness.

Practice is not controlled but self-regulates, flowing as a balancing act at a moving point of equilibrium. Equilibrium arises naturally, from the fact that life and the practice of self-inquiry are not separate.

In the course of practice, the practitioner's lifestyle has changed significantly. He has lost almost everything he once had: work, property, most relationships, etc. The practitioner ceased to invest energy in maintaining his former lifestyle. Without effort, the framework of his former life collapsed; the flow of events swept away the remnants of the structure.

Left without means, the practitioner tried to engage in income-generating activities (he has various skills and knowledge). However, he discovered that he has neither interest nor incentives to pursue them – the mechanisms that create involvement in human activity are absent in him. Without interest and a willingness to play roles, any participation in human activity ceases on its own. The practitioner does not do that with which he is incompatible. He left it to life itself to decide how and what to be.

Liberation from suffering occurs not as an acquisition of new qualities, but as a loss of the mechanisms that produce suffering. Along with these mechanisms, the transmission of suffering to other living beings through the complex network of interactions is also lost – the practitioner gradually ceases to be a node in this multi-layered network. The changes in lifestyle and the reduction of interaction with the surrounding world are consequences of such a loss, occurring naturally, without intervention.

The connecting link between the practitioner and society is the necessity of offering non-addressed help.

All that the practitioner possesses is understanding. This must be given away.

Understanding must be packaged in the form of a gesture of non-addressed help and released into the flow of life.

Such a gesture simultaneously performs two distinct actions. First: the flow of life picks up and carries the gesture of help to whoever needs it. Second: the gesture liberates the practitioner – the reason for which the practitioner appeared in this world ceases; the practitioner finally ceases to be a node in the complex network of interactions.

Regarding the first action. The recipient is unknown; the practitioner does not know and cannot know the result – life itself will take care of it. The practitioner performs only his part of the action.

Regarding the second action. The practitioner must find and implement a non-trivial solution to the paradox: to fully give away understanding and not leave himself as a pointing monument. What the found solution will be, in what form the transmission of understanding will occur – depends on the practitioner himself, on his inherent predispositions and qualities. The solution to this paradox is always individual.

What matters is not the quantity but the quality of the gesture: purity, form, and other properties. The gesture must be profitless and moderately transparent; it must not point to itself; it must not be manipulative and/or intrusive – this would devalue the gesture. The action must be minimally necessary and, at the same time, complete – containing all of the practitioner's understanding in a concentrated form. Such is the nature of the flow of life: a tree gives away a seed, which contains the tree within itself. The large in the small.

The "teacher syndrome" can manifest itself in any phase of practice. The "syndrome" relies on a legitimate, natural foundation: the offering of help and the transmission of understanding are built into the structure of being – it is a necessity, like passing a relay baton. This necessity can be appropriated by the remnants of the practitioner's i-filter at different stages of the practice of self-inquiry. Help turns into a disguise, used for the self-preservation of the i-filter and for obtaining benefit. Therefore, the question of "teaching" is highly ambiguous, lacks clearly defined boundaries, and requires attentive consideration.

Probable consequences for the practitioner: an unexplored lacuna remains – the "teacher." This role deprives the action of functional completeness: the role preserves (conserves) what should be given away. An incomplete action does not liberate the practitioner from the complex network of interactions – the relay baton has not been passed. The mechanism of inheritance leaves a preserved residue of the i-filter for the next cycle of practice.

An effective prevention of the "teacher syndrome" is the continuation of the practice of self-inquiry until the practitioner's death.

Project Metamorphosis – a relay baton in the flow of life, passed by nobody knows who to nobody knows whom.